10.1 - Blank Forms

I’m not sending this to AEGIS as a report. I’m just typing it to make myself feel better.

I didn’t have anything to fill in for the superhero survey. In the moment, I just froze up. “Who are you as a superhero?” I’m … well, am I a superhero? If I say no, then what am I doing here?

Let’s pretend I was answering all of this honestly though.

Name: Alex Gemini Shelby, the worst alias of all time
Superhero Name: Gemini, because I have no creativity
Mentor: Agent Ted Waters
Villain Focus: Whoever gets in the way during my investigation
Why Am I Doing This: because some kids are powerful and mysterious, and some adults are scared, and they want me to keep an eye on things

When I was born, my name was ██████████████. That’s gone now. Parents, gone. Oh, they’re alive and well. They just don’t want to ever see me again, and I kind of feel the same way. Only not all the time.

I can’t be what the school thinks I’m supposed to be, or what my team is supposed to be. Oh, I can be what my friends actually are, that’s the easy part. It’s also the depressing part.

Mette wants to fix the future. Heroism? Eh, take it or leave it. Joey wants to stop being a gorilla. Kiln wants to go back in time. Everyone on this team, except Roddy, doesn’t really want to be here, doing this. This is like a big annoying interruption of their real program, which is to get the hell out of wherever they are now.

And me, I just want to get back to hacking stuff. I don’t want to feel bad every time I tell another lie, and have to memorize the lie so I can keep my cover story straight.

I can’t tell them the full extent of what I do, without being unable to do it any more. I need them to trust me, to some degree. I need them to keep telling me stuff, keep letting me in.

All I can do is what I’m doing now. Helping them along their path.

Joey and Kiln, mi amigos, I am doing my best to send you home again. This temple chase thing, that’s the best I can do for you two. I honestly thought Hellbinder would be a little more impressed with my information packet - I need to investigate why he wasn’t, because that’s a big gap in my intel - but it doesn’t matter since the sales pitch worked.

Mette, I don’t know what all the future holds, but we’re gonna do some science and find out how I can get your stuff fixed. Until then, I’m watching every aberrant action, every gonzo move, and building a model of what you think needs to be done. We’ll get you there.

Roddy, my dude, I want you to be a hero. I know you can be. When the rest of us are gone, you’ll find new friends, lead your own team, be a winner. I envy you.

Until it’s all done, though, all I can do is soldier on.

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Alright! Time for a better mood around here. It’s just me and the Bots on the Satellite o’ Love, watching cheesy teenage heroes as part of a sadistic experiment.

Things we’ll need for the temple hunt!

  1. DIGDUG needs to keep running. I need to figure out extra parameters to plug into it as well. Consult with some kind of geologist.
  2. Transportation to and from sites. Requisition a plane or helicopter or something, along with pilot. This is going to be a hard sell with the higher-ups, but I think if I give them the Hellbinder material as well as promise them results on the outcome, they’ll buy it.
  3. On that note, any kind of survival or navigation equipment we might need. I’m kind of imagining this shit will be up in the Andes or whatever and we’ll probably need to Indiana Jones our way into a place full of deadly traps.
  4. We have to keep performing academically, it looks like. Fine. Double-check how everyone’s grades are doing, and offer tutoring to anyone who’s falling behind.

Costume change! I am not going back to AEGIS for a personal disguise again. No no no no no. Alright, look through the closet, see what I’ve got.

Jesus, no. Okay, time for some online shopping.

  • Some kind of durable travel clothing. Good boots. Check what the field agents in Department 12 are wearing. Shit. I hate those d-bags.
  • Uh, some kind of nondescript masc look. Ripped jeans, obscure band t-shirt, sneakers.
  • Nicer dress-up masc outfit. Billowy shirt so I don’t have to bind so hard - kind of rough when I have to jump into action. Slacks. Some of those goofy shoes you have to break in for a few days.
  • Some kind of hard goth grrl look, black punk style, short skirt, fishnets, heels with spikes that’ll put out an eye.
  • “Cute” femme look, big sweater, ripped jeans, cute shoes, cat sunglasses. Someone nobody will give a second look to.
  • A good waterproof tactical outfit. Metal inserts, balaclava, bandolier, the works. I don’t think we’ll be encountering any hostiles, but just in case… And man, I do not want to be bringing guns to this thing. Don’t think I won’t, though.

That should make me reasonably incognito in most environments.

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Alright. Time to think about the biggest, most important hurdle in tracking down temples wherever they might be.

Internet access.

The easiest way is a series of drones that create a wireless mesh, along with a satellite uplink. The Inmarsat IsatHub Terminal is only 384 kbps, but I’m familiar with the command line and I can run in low-bandwidth mode. The SPH AirMast system will extend the network without too much trouble.

If I download a good selection of blank meme templates to local storage, I should be able to avoid getting too bored.


I wonder what kind of preparation superheroes engage in for something like this? “Hey, we’re going to go do something exciting and dangerous”. Do they worry about getting bored? Is that the most important thing on their mind?

Right now all I can think of is little mundane shit. Will we have enough toilet paper? How much money will we need, and in what kind of local currencies? Do I need vaccination? They aren’t going to stick a needle into a metal arm, so where would I get the injection?

What the hell matters to me right now?

I know a real superhero would be thinking grand and high-flown thoughts about justice and liberty and rightness and all that.

Right now all I feel like is someone who got asked to go to church, and is doing it because it’s something their friends want. I don’t belong here, but I’m prepping anyway, because, y’know, you do what your friends need.

Wish I knew what I needed.

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For fun, here’s some random images for what those looks might include.

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