Alex: what kind of amusement park ride uses magnets? A ferrous wheel! Ferrous, like iron, because magnetic…
Rest of the group: …
Alex: you all complained when I was quiet and distant, well, this is the alternative
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Jillian: I love being on the gram! I live by the gram!
Alex: (emailing Agent Waters) yeah I think there’s a girl here who’s admitting to drug use, I’ll get more details soon
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Bully: hey, did you have dolls or action figures growing up?
Alex: Corporal Ken, our love can’t survive the harsh reality of Operation Iraqi Liberation aka OIL! But we have to fight against the bad guys - oh no, Ken’s arm got blown off by an IED!
Alex: Optimus Prime, would you care to join us for tea and crumpets? Why Bumblebee, I’d be delighted. I shall bring my mother’s homemade marmalade recipe as well.
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Jillian: (excited) so many fascinating rumors to keep track of at this school!
Alex: (sarcastic) so many fascinating rumors to keep track of at this school
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Cue Jillian teaming up with Alex to publish The Daily Trample, the best sourced gossip rag in high school.
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In a high school where you have time travelers, people who can go invisible, psychics, hyperintelligents, people with super-vision/hearing/taste, speedsters, etc., I would imagine keeping any secrets would be tough.
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Sync: are you seeing anyone?
Alex: I see everyone, I have great surveillance options
Sync: no I mean are you with anyone?
Alex: nah, my dorm room is one person
Sync: like, are you single or not?
Alex: there’s only one Alex Shelby!
Sync: argh. Listen, do you have anyone special you’re after…
Alex: there’s no high-value targets or monitoring assignments I’m on right now
Sync: I give up
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Sync: Are you seeing anyone?
Joey: NO! I mean … well, yes, of course, I see people, ha! I’m not blind, right? But sure, I can see someone, several someones, but one someone maybe in particular, I see her, laughing, joking, smiling, being normal and funny and lost and lonely and lovely and – but I’m not seeing her seeing her, because, c’mon, and I hope she doesn’t see me – seeing her, I mean see me seeing her, because that would be really embarrassing and – wait, why are you asking, are you seeing WHO I’M SEEING?
Sync: I give up.
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Jillian: psst, Alex, what’s the answer to this question?
Alex: some things you should be doing yourself, okay?
Teacher: Okay. Jillian, what’s the answer?
Jillian: uhhhhhhh. Some things you should do for yourself?
Teacher: That’s correct. Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote about self-reliance.
Alex: …
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There’s reason to be hopeful…
Teacher 1: we lost a promising freshman to another school. Detective type, keen senses, super-heightened smell, taste, everything
Teacher 2: what happened?
Teacher 1: she tried the cafeteria meatloaf
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Teacher: detention didn’t keep you out of trouble, did it. We are using harsher measures
Delinquent: bring it on
Teacher: you’re being sentenced to band
Delinquent: (whispering) oh god no
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Theater kid: Kiln, we need you as Romeo! Come on, only you can do it.
Kiln: haven’t you asked Evan?
Theater kid: He’s Juliet
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Emma: why are you wearing a print shirt and retro glasses?
Nono: I’m trying to dress the part!
Emma: part of what?
Nono: I write fan fictions and cute pairings before they become popular. That makes me a shipster!
Emma: I immediately regret asking about this
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Joe: Ugh! I hate how Evan always has girls hanging around him. They always crowd my desk and I don’t know what to do. I have no idea how he talks to all of them.
Evan, overhearing: It isn’t so bad talking to them, though I wouldn’t object to some more guys joining in 
Joe, incredibly glad nobody can tell he’s blushing through his fur: …
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Hunter: I dare you to kiss the hottest person here
Evan: Mette?
Mette: Yes, Evan?
Evan: move so I can kiss that mirror behind you
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Teacher: make teams of four for a group project!
(after much shuffling)
Joe: looks like I’m with Paul, Allan, and Alex
Alex: guess that makes you the outsider
Joe: (bristling) what do you mean by that?
Alex: well you’re the only one without an ‘A’ in your name
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Sync: what are your nicknames for me?
Alex: Rod Roddy, Rod the Bod, Roddy Ramjet, Roddy Serling, Rowdy Roddy Piper, Kitchen Sync, Sync or Swim, Punchclock…
Sync: you came up with all of this?
Alex: my dude, surveillance is so boring. You’ll do anything to pass the time
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Kiln: What was your favorite part of our adventure?
Alex: Hacking his cell phone to track his location
Joe: Tearing the roof off of his vehicle and pulling him out
Mette: Lifting him away before his reinforcements could arrive
Sync: Dangling him over the roof until he recanted his evil ways!
Sergeant SURGE: Students who harass other students should be reported to the teachers. This is why you five are in detention today.
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Alex: There’s no I in team, but there is one in chicken fingers.
Kiln: … So you’re not gonna share?
Alex: Absolutely not.
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Joe: Wait. There’s two I’s in “chicken fingers” … so are you gonna …?
Alex: No means no.
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